Comfort for the Day

Living through the seasons of grief.

Risky Intentional Acts of Kindness

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERAChoosing to enter into someone’s bubble of grief may be the most risky intentional act of kindness we may ever do.

What do you mean, risk?

We might encounter a great deal of pain, (sometimes there are no words to describe it). We might find ourselves in a long term commitment, (bereavement must run its full course).  We might be inconvenienced, (the waves of grief are unpredictable).  We might be uncomfortable (our own mortality could demand attention).

But we will rarely (meaning almost never) add to the pain of the griever by choosing to come alongside and support them with our care and presence. The risk is not in adding to their pain, but exposing ourselves to discomfort.  We sometimes use that as an excuse to stay aloof and leave their pain unmentioned, their confusion and fears ignored, and their broken heart invalidated.

I dare us to choose intentional acts of kindness toward those who mourn. As the holidays continue to lurch toward us, just imagine how they must long for their deceased loved one. Wouldn’t you want someone to reach out to you? Wouldn’t you want to be included instead of isolated? Wouldn’t you want an opportunity to share your load of pain? Wouldn’t you want to be reassured with hope that your bereavement wasn’t leading you to a place of no return?

Choosing to enter into their world might become the biggest blessing we have ever experienced; for isn’t it more blessed to give than to receive?

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