Comfort for the Day

Living through the seasons of grief.

A Challenge to the Comforter Part 2

What one grieving person needs from you

“Well I would just add that people are so different! I think what I need is so different from the next person you know. I do think I am disappointed by the offers to help from the church body itself. There should be a survey they mail to you with questions like:

  • Meals?
  • What can we do?
  • Do you want to be left alone?
  • Do you want people over to cry with.
  • We are making a gift basket. What is your favorite restaurant for a gift card.
  • Favorite place to shop?
  • Music?
  • Would you like help with yard work?

I have an inner will that God is giving me to do things on my own like change fire alarm batteries and stack wood and locate fuses when the power goes out. I can’t rely on help from people all my life and I want to show my girls I can figure things out too. Plus I don’t like feeling needy and want to solve things on my own. But at the same time, I’d love my lawn moved because I can’t even start lawn mower. ”

Do you get the tension in this mourning mother’s experience?  She wants to be strong, but is hurting so much it is difficult to function.  Simple normal tasks are overwhelming to the bereaved.  Developing a trusting relationship with such a hurting person requires tact, wisdom, gentleness, and perseverance.  I trust you will be inspired to reach out to the grieving with a greater sense of understanding.  Go surrendered in prayer.

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